23 March 2007

Tear Down the Walls

Given my incredible list of failures with the opposite sex, I was basically left with two options. In order to survive the emotional crisis inside, I could either withdraw completely from society, or I could Protect the weakness inside. When you are needy, and insecure, and completely dependent upon others for your self image, it's incredibly hard to withdraw from that necessary input, no matter how negative the input is. So I chose the other option. I built a wall. I built it so that no one could get into that quagmire, and sometimes its for their own good. I figured, I'm married, she doesn't need to be exposed to the worst of that. Who fuckin' knew that someone else was going grab a shovel and dig right under, undermining the whole thing. Collapsing it in a vast explosion of dust and mortar. I think I've pretty much explained how well all that turned out. So you think after that, I'd build it up right this time. Make the foundations deeper. Keep that shit from happening again. No, I'm not smart enough for that. I rebuilt the walls, Better, Stronger, Higher, and put a gate in it. Which I threw open to the first person that gave a shit. Sweet. I'd never wanted to be the one to keep repeating the same mistakes again and again. I hate people that do that. I detest those people. I feel so SUPERIOR over those that can't avoid repeating their same old mistakes, again and again. Looking at it with totally detachment, I should really be hating myself. Who builds a wall and leaves the f-ing door wide open?!

Michael

7 comments:

mist1 said...

Have you thought about installing a moat? I got a moat a few years ago. I love it.

heather said...

someone who doesn't really want the wall there in the first place, even if it's subconsious.

KDRocker said...

Er....hindsight is 20/20?

fringes said...

A moat! Great idea, Mist. I'll build mine today.

briliantdonkey said...

I would have to agree with heather. Someone that refuses to really believe the wall is necessary. I refuse to believe that it is myself. The bad thing about walls is while they keep the bad out, sometimes they keep YOU in as well and defeat the purpose. Easier? yes. Better at times? yes. But TRULY better in the long run? No not a chance.Just my 2 cents

BD

Roadchick said...

Remember the movie "Shawshank Redemption"?

The 'chick's got a spoon.

Instructions will be under the black rock that doesn't belong in a rock wall in Texas.

See you on the beach in Mexico.

Susan said...

I've always said when I build my walls it's purely to see who cares enough to tear them down...